Why should there be classes in life? Why should another human being treated differently? as if they were not matter at all.. as if they were not important.. but that is what happening in life.. it happens everywhere.. at school there might be some students that get more special attention from the teachers.. at work there might be some staff that get promoted faster even though everybody is working equally good.. I’m not saying to deny all these stuff.. but what happen if you see your children been treated differently.. what would you do??
My heart was crushed to pieces each time I saw this happen.. I don’t want people to treat my daughter’s extra special, I just want equal treatments.. But of course I could not control all this, even with family members.. I can’t do anything if they think my daughters are not as precious or even as cute as their cousins for example. There is nothing that I can do if they don’t really love or care for them. Nothing at all..
Of course they have enough attention from us as parents. We never abandoned them. Ever since they were born we were the only one who really knows them, who’d be there for them. We are the only one who spent countless night sleepless caring for them. We are the only ones that they come to for anything..
As a mother, whenever I see that my child been treated differently, my greatest fear would be the impact of it on their personality.. I don’t want them to feel inferior or insufficient.. I don’t want their confidence to deteriorate.. and worst of all I don’t want them to start accepting any bad treatments given to them simply because they think they deserve it.. childrens who get bullied at home tend to get bullied at school too (and at work later in life) because they have come into a stage of acceptance.. I don’t want that to happen to them..
But, as my husband always said, hopefully the love that we gave to them is enough to make them feel special, precious and worthy. And all these 2nd class thingy would mould them into a stronger, more compassionate, more matured, more thoughtful person. Insyaallah…
Got this sms from my husband recently..
“saya proud ngan anak2 kita, boleh bawak diri, tak naughty sangat, cerdik, quite well behaved.. berbaloi kita keras ngan diorang dulu..”
Yes, we were really tough with them. Ever since we became parents we were determined not to raised any brats.. In case you were wondering who are considered as Brats you just have to look around you.. Brats are kids that even their own parents could not control.. you’ll see them in the mall yelling and screaming their heads off.. and you’ll see their parents always pleading and begging.. People would think that this brat trait would go away as they are getting older.. This is not true at all, once a brat always a brat, they are just getting smarter in hiding their brattiness.. They are going to have difficulties later in life since they can't really cope with rejections, frustrations and failure.
Some of you might think that I’m cruel but I started to train my child not to become brats as early as a few weeks old. I would usually let them cry first if they were hungry… I didn’t always shoved the milk to them without them having to ask for it first.. childrens who grew up getting everything without having to ask would just turned up to be one selfish individual expecting the world to cater for their only need and to be able to read their mind and know what they want. Serious psychological problems there.. By letting my babies to cry first, as early as two months old I was able to differentiate between the cry for hunger, the cry for wet nappies or just simply ngada2 wanted to be hold. I would pick them up for feeding and changing, but I won’t be picking them up for the third reason. It was really hard to do as a mother, especially with Melati whom to me is the most beautiful baby ever.. Gradually after a few days they learned that I’m not going to pick them up and start playing with themselves and enjoying their independence.. They hardly cries after that.. It is much easier to detect whenever they got sick too, compared to ngada2 crybabies who cries all the time. I never let them sleep with me, ever since day one they have to sleep on their cot, in their own room. I never wait for them to fall asleep, or tepuk2, sing them lullaby etc.. I just put them down nice and snug, switch off the lights and closed the door. Babies who were left to fall asleep on their own won’t cry if they suddenly wakes up in the middle of the night, if they were not hungry they would just go back to sleep or play by themselves.. and babies who used to play by themselves would develop faster..
Grandparents tend to be one of the factors that would spoil or turned childrens to brats.. But this is actually their role, they were meant to pamper and spoil their grandchildrens.. It is healthy if given for example on a weekly basis but not daily. It is the parents fault themselves. Sadly and sickening, most young parents simply shoved their babies/childrens to the grandparents to be taken care of. Just by taking pictures with your baby and post it all over facebook won’t make you a parent, you have to bath them, feed them, play with them etc.. It is your role to raise your child not their grandparents. No wonder your children won’t listen to you, who are you to them.. after all, they still have their grandparents to turned to.. and with them, they can get away with everything…
Speaking of getting away.. some parents just simply forgive their child whenever they did something wrong right after they made a not guilty face and said sorry. This is one big NO!NO!.. I know that you think your child is so cute with that sad puppy face but wrong is still considered wrong and they must be punished. One simple sorry simply won’t do. Discussed with your partner and rule out which are considered wrong and what type of punishment should be given. And stick to that, be consistent.. Don’t scold and punish them one day and let them go the other day for the same wrongdoings.
Whenever I, or the father were scolding any of our children, the other parent will not interfere. Often I see for example when one father was scolding his child, the mother would interfere to defend the child.. this is so unacceptable.. no matter how you detest it, voiced your concern behind closed doors afterwards and not in front of that child. Don’t give him/her any hope of people coming to their rescue each time they were in trouble. The other parent should not join in the scolding too; he/she should wait until the ordeal is over and help to console and knock some sense into the child later.
I always gawk in disbelief whenever I heard any parents bragging about their child mischievousness, and to make matters worse he/she did it in front of the child.. It might seem funny to them at the moment (although I found it not funny at all especially when it involves violence) but please avoid doing that.. you should have seen the expression of pride on your child face.. Hello!!! That is not something to be proud of.. and afterwards you’ll have a tough time correcting it, because you already instill it to the child that what he/she did was good/funny /cute or whatever you want to call it.. So, Lu Pikirlah Sendiri!!
Glad to share some of this Brat Buster Tips, hope that it would be beneficial to some. I’m not a child expert here, just a mother of two who simply refused to raise a brat. People around us were saying that we were lucky to have such a well behaved kids.. We were indeed truly grateful to have them but the truth is there is no luck involved at all, we just made a point to them that we, the parents are the one in charge since day one, not them.. and they understand the concept.. as simple as that..
Resipi ni sedap dan senang, sesuai sangat dimakan panas2 dengan nasi putih sebagai lauk bersahur.
Sorry all for not being able to update this blog.. I've been super busy for the past couple of weeks.. no time for blogging, facebooking and even TV.. I can't even remember the last time I watched TV.. The reason being is I was being repatriated back to Malaysia.. we are bidding farewell to Vietnam that has been our home for more than 3 years.. Melati actually refers to Vietnam as home.. she's only 1 1/2 years when we first came here..
On 26th June we pack all our stuff to be shipped to Malaysia..
We start the day with our usual wrestling and gigling session on the bed.. 
Nilam is having her last swim with her Japanese friend Aoi.. 
Later the girls begs to go to their favourite restaurant, The Satay House.. We were actually quite lazy to go there today since it is situated quite far from Ho Chi Minh but the girls keep saying that although there'll be plenty of food in Malaysia but it won't be the same since it is not from Satay House.. pretty smart reasoning huh?
With Uncle Ahmad Foo.. the Satay House towkey.. 
And finally to the movies.. It's all that we ever do here.. we were watching Night at the Museum II that afternoon..
We arrived in Malaysia on Sunday afternoon.. The first place that we go to is the Pasar Malam.. nilam is actually so "jakun" to see the Pasar Malam.. she keep asking whether all the food is halal.. the food I really miss the most here is the Apam Balik and Tau Fu Fa.. once we have to live abroad we will start to appeciate all those little things such as the pasar malam that sometimes define our culture and our country.. Another thing that I miss the most too is waking up in the morning to the sound of azan.. and I can't also wait for Ramadan to come..
Atuk and Nenek from both sides sending the girls off on their first day of school..
Melati's first school day experience and Nilam's first day of School in Malaysia.. Since it is July it is very difficult to find books for Nilam.. we searched the whole KL for certain books.. most store ran out of it but didn't order more because it is already July.. we end up photocopying some of nilam's books..
The girls now.. all settled in Malaysia.. they prefer kaftan now.. "Du Lundi Au Samedi" pyjamas are too hot to be worn here.. Unlike me.. they lose some chubbiness due to the transition... I secretly wished that I could lose some weight during all these but sadly that is not happening.. *sigh*
It's a relief to finally be home.. but Vietnam shall definitely be missed..
I've been so busy lately, with the packing, rushing to meet datelines, handover and all.. luckily last Thursday hubby's company organized a 3 day Family Day to Anoasis Resort, Long Hai Beach, Baria, Vung Tau.. finally.. I can breathe and smell the roses.. and to my relief.. there are no internet services inside the rooms.. so I can find an excuse for not answering emails for three days..
I've been wanting to go to the Anoasis Resort since 2006, ever since one of my colleague keep mentioning it.. but I can say I'm really dissappointed with the resort.. I won't recommend it to anybody.. the price is high, USD100++.. the area is pretty big, so you need to walk for a very long distance.. There is a buggy service but not as frequent as it should be.. We were lucky to get a room near the beach and pool but it was very far from the bus and reception.. the service is bad and the resort seems to be understaff and not really well kept.. The food is really expensive compared to the standard hotel price..
This is the stairs leading to our room.. It has a sea view but it is situated slightly uphill so you can't really sea or hear the beach..
This is another type, the cottage bungalow..
The girls were walking towards what they thought is the kids play area..
It turned out to have only a few toys and they need to share the area with the gym which has only three exercise machines..
This the pool and ping-pong hut..
Nilam really enjoys the swing.. we can only find these two swings.. perhaps there were more but we didn't walk far enough..
These are the rest area.. However, it is always too dirty to sit on..
The pool is quite big but it didn't have a sea view like other seaside resort..
These seaside beach hut is more inviting..
On the second day we went to Binh Chau Hot Spring 35 Km away from the resort. We initially planned to take a mud bath or take a dip in the big hot spring pool but we end up arriving there rather late that afternoon.. We then decided to just boil and eat some eggs and do the foot bath..
The children can't wait to taste their eggs.. of course it taste the same.. nothing different actually.. but the girls keep saying that the eggs taste better compared to the one at home..
I love salad.. call it rabbit food or what.. I just love it..
The main attraction of a hotel buffet to me is the salad spread (other than the desserts section of course..)
My colleague once said to me that I'm weird based on my favourite salad dressing which is the creamy french dressing claiming that you can actually predict a person character based on their favourite dressing.. I can accept it if people call me weird based on what I've done.. but based on my choice of dressing???
I'm not sure if he got it from any of the stupid quizzes in facebook (one of the reason I seldom log in to facebook anymore.. because everbody is so busy doing stupid quizzes.. hehe..)
Anyway.. curious about it.. I google it out and found all these interpretation..
Ranch dressing is a condiment made of buttermilk or sour cream, mayonnaise, minced green onion, garlic powder, and other seasonings mixed into a sauce.
You'd probably pick the country over the city.
You are a well rounded individual.
You're very creative and artistic.
You're great with your hands!!!
You love being with your friends...a social butterfly who's also a team player-people love you for that.
The Blue Cheese dressing.
You're laid back and care free.
You like taking it easy.
Even though you love to lounge, you are always up for an adventure.
Competitiveness is not in your nature.
You like to spend a lot of money on food: take out, cooking, or eating out.
Your friends love your free spirited attitute and appreciation for the good things in life.
I guess this is the most famous dressing in Malaysia.. The Thousand Island dressing! 
My hubby came back from work craving for grilled lamb today.. Here's my quick fix grilled lamb recipe..
Lamb
Marinate 4 piece of lamb with 2 tsp Mc Cormick Broiled Steak seasoning salt, 1 tbsp Kraft A1 Steak sauce, 1 1/2 tbsp honey and a dash of Lea & Perrins Worchester Sauce. Leave it for a few minutes.
Heat 1 tsp of oil in the pan and seared/cook the lamb (I usually avoid using Olive Oil for frying, it tastes better but I've read somewhere that it could be carcinogenic).
Veggies
I happen to have only carrot and potatoes in the fridge.. you can use whatever you like; broccoli, cauliflower, peas or brussel sprouts.. and steamed those vegetables, it tastes much better compared to just blanching.. grilled/sauteed baby tomatoes goes great too with lamb..
Gravy
Just heat up the pan already used for cooking the lamb, melt 1 tbsp of butter.. sauteed one clove of garlic(thinly sliced).. add in 1 tbsp of flour.. cooked the flour for a while and later add in some water until the desired consistency ; season with 1/2 tulang rusuk/beef maggi cube and 1/2 tsp of ground black pepper.. You can also add a bit of dark soya sauce if you want the gravy to have a slightly darker colour.
I should have started packing by this weekend.. However there is something more important to do.. I shouldn't delay any longer mending Melati's best friend.. her rag doll.. she pronounced it as "Dau". She would bring that doll everywhere and she couldn't go to bed without it..
This is Melati at 6 months old.. already inseparable with the doll.. I bought this doll for Nilam but I put it in Melati's cot when she was born.. Among all of the toys that I've put there, that doll was the first and only thing that she reached for.. It is also sad to think that at this early age Melati already learned that her parents are not that reliable and could not always be by her side and she try to seek comfort in a more reliable thing such as the doll..
This is the condition of the doll now.. the face is so thin you can actually see the cotton that was stuffed inside.. The head is almost bald, the dress is torn and already lose it's colour..
This is the doll new look in which I've spent my weekend achieving it.. I sew on a new piece of white cloth on it's face, neck, front and back. I replaced the hair with a longer, pink coloured hair, made a new dress and add a hat.. Only the hands and feet remains untouched..
Melati screamed and threw the doll the first time I handed it to her.. Eventually she pick it up and started accepting it.. She must have realised that it still smells and feels the same as the old "dau"..
We don't have that many choices of places to go on weekends.. There is a few shopping complex but we are really not into shopping here in Ho Chi Minh because there is no size for us here (only S & M for Vietnamese).. We keep on rotating a few play areas such as at Saigon Tax, Maxi Mart and craft centres at Fahasa Bookstore.. It is too hot to go to the theme Parks (which is nowhere near what we have in Malaysia).. Luckily there is a new addition now, the Lotte Mart.. Actually I would rather sleep or rest at home when both of us were not working on weekends but my youngest daughter always begs to go out.. I didn't send her to school yet so weekends are the only time for her to get out of the house..
Lotte Mart is located at Phu My Hung, District 7.. it took about 30 minutes to reach there from our apartment by car.. It is considered far by Ho Chi Minh standard (certainly not by KL standard)..
Funny that the girls go gaga over this huge fridge replica.. they actually thinks that the fridge is real and was wondering how to open it..
Melati really enjoys the ball pit..
The girls were waiting first in line for the train ride that comes every 30 minutes..
This train ride also was Melati's favourite..
Nilam was ecstatic to see all these cute things.. but she couldn't buy anything since she forgot her purse.. Me and her father end up buying two cute picture frames to put at our office.. hehehe..