Diamonds are just coals that do well under pressures...

I'm really back

2011-09-23T00:48:00.000-07:00

Dear bloggers,
I know I've told that Im back before but after that I dissappeared for more than a year.. I hope that it wont happen again and I'm really back this time.. So many things had happened for the past one year that I actually don't know where I should start..
Let's see.. my husband no longer works in Vietnam, he came back early this year. At that time I'm already a few months pregnant, I conceived just after Raya last year (Sept - Oct 2010) while I was in Vietnam (for a short assignment).. we even spent our Raya there.. my boss was joking (after he found out that I was pregnant) that it is not the kind of work he was hoping I would do when he sent me there. ;P
Anyway, coming back to early this year, my husband came back, Im in my Mid-Trimester and we were working on buying a new house. We moved out of my in-law's bungalow (my friend cynically used to call it "pondok mertua indah") into our home sweet home by Chinese New Year.. All is well for the time being, we were all very happy to be in our new home.. even our Pet Hamsters (buih & popcorn) who seems to be gravely ill and almost dying fluorished in this new home..
Meanwhile, My pregnancy wasn't so good, the doctor was very worried, my BP keep on skyrocketting.. on top of that there were also some risk of breaching with my very thin uterus due to 2 previous C-Section. Finally the doctor manage to persuade me to take a couple of weeks earlier sick leave cum maternity leave. However, on the first day of my leave I started to show some contractions. At that moment Im at 35 weeks into my pregnancy.. With my BP reading higher than usual the doctor decided to perform a C-Section immediately.. that afternoon at 4.00 pm in the middle of a very heavy thunderstorm a beatiful baby boy was born. He got melati's fair skin, nilam's beautiful eyes, my husband long face, very sweet lips and my prominent big nose.. The name that we gave to him was Eijaz Muzaffar, Eijaz for Miracle and Muzaffar for Victory. That night the nurse came and let me hold him for a few minutes, Im still too weak and in pain.. he was sleeping.. little that I know that is the only time I would be able to hold him. The next morning after my husband visited him, there was an alarm in the nursery for Eijaz is turning blue.. they quickly put him in the incubator.. starting from that moment his health deteriorates and he is getting weaker each day. His heart eventually stop pumping on the fifth day.. During that five days I only manage to visit him just a couple of time, for I myself was in pain.. the pain somehow is much greater than my previous two surgical delivery.. But even for a few short visit I manage to see him open his eyes once and had a chance to hear him cry.. I expressed my milk and the nurse had to give it to him using a cup because he's too weak to suck. The doctor diagnosed him to have a severe congenital heart disease and there was actually no hope for survival.. I will always remember the last night we were together, I came to the ICU at about 11 pm, the nurse told me that Eijaz had been crying for quite some time and nothing seems to work, he just wont stop crying. I couldn't hold him, his eyes was also covered because he had to be put under the UV light.. Yet the moment he sensed that I was standing next to his incubator, he immediately stopped crying.. he just need me.. and he was saying good bye in his own way..
Losing Eijaz was the most painful experience that I had to endure.. I pray that none of my family members and friends will have to go through the same ordeal.. I was so consumed with grief for a couple of weeks that I brush everybody away including my parents, my husband and my two daughters.. Im better now.. looking back, it seems that I have two life, I can call it before Eijaz and after Eijaz.. the one before Eijaz is a much happier person but the one after Eijaz is a much stronger person.. Time obviously is the best medicine, it wont be able to heal but it will at least lessen the pain.. losing a child is not something that you will recover from, it will stay with you until the day you die.. I pray that he's happy there and already wait for me in the afterlife.. insyaallah..

I'm back!!

2010-05-05T22:12:00.001-07:00

salam dear bloggers..
sorry for neglecting this blog for so long.. been very very busy..

I've been so immersed with work.. now is a transition time for me,
I'm moving to another project soon.. (or to a new company.. who knows?)..
let's just say I'm enjoying the calm before the next storm..

so.. what's new.. nothing much..
few months ago I bought a mountain bike.. (it's not a big deal, I guess everybody in town had a mtb or road bike these days)..
I end up doing the same mistake as always (why oh why did I never learned)that is buying the only pink bike in the store.. Pink Cannondale F7.. mainly just because of the looks and colour..
After a few ride I realised that it's just not for me, it's not comfortable enough..
So I ask my husband to buy me another one, Kona 2010.. I manage to persuade him and my friend to buy themselves a new mtb too.. what to do.. I need my bodyguards.. hehe.. Anyway, I manage to enjoy a few rides, after that came this very nasty heatwave.. of all the things I really can't stand the heat.. I almost fainted one afternoon during a ride because of the heat.. So the cycling activity was put on hold until cooler weather comes..
This is me with my good friend who had to ride alone these days because I can't stand the heat.. sorry beb, next time we go k? hehe..

mmm what else.. I've been into gardening too.. I've transformed my in law's porch into a very relaxing place with many colourful and fragrant flowers.. fortunately my husband is not always around.. otherwise he'll make so much noise, apa ni? asik2 pergi Sg. Buloh.. takde kerja lain ke? hehe.. This is one of my favourite flowers.. melati jasmine.. the smell is so strong and so nice especially at night..

my latest craze is fish.. yup.. everyday after work I would stop by at the kedai ikan or pet shop.. I end up having three aquariums to maintain now, arowana & kelah which I put at the front porch, one with goldfish in the living room and one marine aquarium next to the dining table.

I initially bought the arowana for nilam, but it turns out that she didn't like the silver subspecies, she prefers the Red Tail Golden which is so expensive.. Kids these days.. I don't know how and when she became the arowana expert.. This is the silver arowana.. still small.. the only thing I don't like about it is that it really likes to jump, almost gave me a heart attack everytime I wanted to change the water..

Stress Kills

2010-01-22T05:27:00.001-08:00

A friend mentioned to me once about this website.. www.drlam.com It's a site about natural medicine.. From many articles that they featured there one caught our attentions.. It is the one called adrenal fatigue.. they said that the technical term is hypoadrenia.. The scary thing is I got all of their symptoms spot on.. let me share some of the symptoms here..

- Tendency to gain weight and unable to loose it, especially around the waist.
- High frequency of getting the flu and other respiratory diseases and these symptoms tend to last longer than usual.
- Tendency to tremble when under pressure.
- Reduced sex drive.
- Lightheaded when rising from a laying down position.
- Unable to remember things.
- Lack of energy in the mornings and also in the afternoon between 3 to 5 pm.
- Feel better suddenly for a brief period after a meal.
- Often feel tired betweeen 9 - 10 pm, but resist going to bed.
- Need coffee or stimulants to get going in the morning.
- Crave for salty, fatty, and high protein food such as meat and cheese.
- Increase symptoms of PMS for women; period are heavy and then stop, or almost stopped on the 4th day, only to start flow again on the 5th or 6th day.
- Pain in the upper back or neck with no apparent reasons.
- Feels better when stress is relieved, such as on a vacation.
- Difficulties in getting up in the morning
- Lightheaded
- Mild depression
- Food and or inhalant allergies
- Lethargy and lack of energy
- Increased effort to perform daily tasks
- Decreased ability to handle stress
- Dry and thin skin
- Low Body Temperature
- Nervousness
- Palpitation
- Unexplained hair loss
- Alternating constipation and diarrhea

there.. I've been having all that for more than a year already.. everyday I would come to the office late.. somehow they still think of me as an asset and did not sack me just yet..

These signs and symptoms are often the end result of acute severe or chronic excessive stress and the inability of the body to reduce such stress. Stress, once a "basket" term used by physicians to explain non-specific symptoms undetectable by conventional blood test, is of no mystery to the body at all.

The ability to handle stress, physical or emotional, is a cornerstone to human survival. Our body has a complete set of stress modulation system in place, and the control center is the adrenal glands. When this gland becomes dysfunctional, our body's ability to handle stress reduces..

ok, doktor2 & doktor2 mude kat luar sana sila jawab.. betul tak ni? & kalau betul camana nak rawat ye? hehe..

For me, once I read this.. I've tried to recover.. I used to laugh when people mentioned stress kills.. but not anymore.. stress do kills, although a bit slow..
although there is no way that I can remove the stressors unless I tender my resignation but I try to get more rest daily and try to eat properly.. For the past few years I can make do with just 4-6 hours of sleep daily, and I always missed my meal.. The only time that I sleep properly was during a vacation and that happens maybe just a couple of times a year..

They even have this diet plan for adrenal fatigue recovery.. I'm trying to stick to it now.. hopefully I'll recover over time even not fully.. and no more anti-depressant from the doctors.. I've read it here that it will just worsens the condition..

Another quite interesting diet plan featured on Dr Lam's website is the one based on blood type, do check it out. My blood type is O and it does mentioned in the chart that I should avoid cabbage and cauliflower as it will trigger thyroid problems. I have half of my thyroid taken out a couple of years ago due to abnormal growth and since childhood these two veggies were my favourites..

I'd love to try this blood type diet one day, but I better get my adrenal glands recover first no matter how long will it take..

Cats in the Cradle

2010-01-13T06:38:00.000-08:00

"Cats in the Cradle".. this song crosses my mind just a couple of minutes ago.. It was sang by a group called Ugly Kid Joe and I can't remember who before that... the "Generation X" like me might knew about this song but I doubt the "Generation Y" would know about it.. It is quite a sad song to me about a father and son relationship..

I've been too busy for the past couple of weeks.. I would reach home only after eight o'clock and I get to spent less than an hour with my girls before they went to bed at nine. Most of the time when I came back they would be waiting for me. I've been living with my in-laws since I came back to Malaysia.. However, my children's were not very close with their grandparents.. their grandparents also were always too occupied with their other two favourite grandkids.. so the girls used to play quietly by themselves while waiting for me to come home.. Sometimes when they got sick or hurt, they wouldn't even tell anybody, they would wait for me to come home to tell me about it.. So, by hook or by crook I have to get home before they went to bed. But sometimes I do missed them and I would see them only when they wake up the next morning..

My husband is currently in Vietnam, so I had to play the single mother role again.. It is the third time for me, the first time was when Nilam is just 6 months old.. it was hard everytime.. even harder when you were so busy all the time.. people do asks me how do I manage to juggle everything.. I told them that I don't have any choice.. Sometimes I was so afraid that I would end up just like the song.. That their only memory of me is just about me missing all their school functions and being so busy all the time..

Lately I keep on thinking to myself that whether the path that I choose is the right one for me or not.. whether I should continue with my career or just tender my resignation.. whether I should just quit my job for a few years to spent more time with them or just continue with it.. All this while my family were the reason for my preseverance, when things get tough at the office I would just think about meeting them at the end of the day and everything would be okay.. they are actually the source of my strength..

But lately.. the same thoughts kept coming.. I've been working to save enough money for their future yet at the same time I'm hurting them.. is it all even worth it.. When I talked about this with my friends they said that I was just being ungrateful, that I should be grateful to even have a job and I should stop complaining.. but they were not even half as busy as I am to start with.. they don't understand the situation..

But the truth is, this is not just about the girls.. For the past years I have been dreaming about this one night.. Yes, I wish that I can have just one night going to bed without even have to think about tomorrows meeting, datelines, reports, presentation etc.. etc.. I can't get this one night even during holidays because I know that work will be piling sky high after I came back.. If you ask me my top ten list of things to do before I die.. this would be on the number one spot.. just to have this one night of peaceful sleep...

I always thought that my knowledge and brains comes with responsibility.. responsibility to serve the people, the religion and the nation.. that's why I've been slaving and sacrificing myself for years.. until how long should I continue this? until how long should I let myself and the girls to sacrifice ourselves?? Sadly, this is the question that only me can answer.. and for the moment I really don't know what should be the answer.. I really don't know...

I can't resist taking this pic at the stationary shop on my way back home today.. Wish that I had one at home.. but I guess it would only last for a couple of weeks.. I don't know why but the girls keep losing their erasers at school.. sometimes almost every day.. when it is time to do their homework, the eraser was gone.. I used to buy Faber Castell and Stabilo before.. now I just buy the cheap Made in Malaysia one that was sold in bundles.. they would be gone in a day or two anyway.. of course as mother I would make so much noise.. little that they knew that their eraser problems are something that make my day that day.. after a hard day I was really looking forward to go home and face their eraser problems.. and grateful that I have that kind of problems to deal with.. it makes me feel rather normal..

This was taken on 2nd January this year while shopping for school supplies.. My dear Nilam & Melati, you have grown so fast.. I hope that you will have a good and loving memory of me and your father..

Second Class

2009-12-14T20:46:00.001-08:00

Why should there be classes in life? Why should another human being treated differently? as if they were not matter at all.. as if they were not important.. but that is what happening in life.. it happens everywhere.. at school there might be some students that get more special attention from the teachers.. at work there might be some staff that get promoted faster even though everybody is working equally good.. I’m not saying to deny all these stuff.. but what happen if you see your children been treated differently.. what would you do??

My heart was crushed to pieces each time I saw this happen.. I don’t want people to treat my daughter’s extra special, I just want equal treatments.. But of course I could not control all this, even with family members.. I can’t do anything if they think my daughters are not as precious or even as cute as their cousins for example. There is nothing that I can do if they don’t really love or care for them. Nothing at all..

Of course they have enough attention from us as parents. We never abandoned them. Ever since they were born we were the only one who really knows them, who’d be there for them. We are the only one who spent countless night sleepless caring for them. We are the only ones that they come to for anything..

As a mother, whenever I see that my child been treated differently, my greatest fear would be the impact of it on their personality.. I don’t want them to feel inferior or insufficient.. I don’t want their confidence to deteriorate.. and worst of all I don’t want them to start accepting any bad treatments given to them simply because they think they deserve it.. childrens who get bullied at home tend to get bullied at school too (and at work later in life) because they have come into a stage of acceptance.. I don’t want that to happen to them..

But, as my husband always said, hopefully the love that we gave to them is enough to make them feel special, precious and worthy. And all these 2nd class thingy would mould them into a stronger, more compassionate, more matured, more thoughtful person. Insyaallah…

I Hate Brats!!!

2009-11-04T07:19:00.000-08:00

Got this sms from my husband recently..
“saya proud ngan anak2 kita, boleh bawak diri, tak naughty sangat, cerdik, quite well behaved.. berbaloi kita keras ngan diorang dulu..”

Yes, we were really tough with them. Ever since we became parents we were determined not to raised any brats.. In case you were wondering who are considered as Brats you just have to look around you.. Brats are kids that even their own parents could not control.. you’ll see them in the mall yelling and screaming their heads off.. and you’ll see their parents always pleading and begging.. People would think that this brat trait would go away as they are getting older.. This is not true at all, once a brat always a brat, they are just getting smarter in hiding their brattiness.. They are going to have difficulties later in life since they can't really cope with rejections, frustrations and failure.

Some of you might think that I’m cruel but I started to train my child not to become brats as early as a few weeks old. I would usually let them cry first if they were hungry… I didn’t always shoved the milk to them without them having to ask for it first.. childrens who grew up getting everything without having to ask would just turned up to be one selfish individual expecting the world to cater for their only need and to be able to read their mind and know what they want. Serious psychological problems there.. By letting my babies to cry first, as early as two months old I was able to differentiate between the cry for hunger, the cry for wet nappies or just simply ngada2 wanted to be hold. I would pick them up for feeding and changing, but I won’t be picking them up for the third reason. It was really hard to do as a mother, especially with Melati whom to me is the most beautiful baby ever.. Gradually after a few days they learned that I’m not going to pick them up and start playing with themselves and enjoying their independence.. They hardly cries after that.. It is much easier to detect whenever they got sick too, compared to ngada2 crybabies who cries all the time. I never let them sleep with me, ever since day one they have to sleep on their cot, in their own room. I never wait for them to fall asleep, or tepuk2, sing them lullaby etc.. I just put them down nice and snug, switch off the lights and closed the door. Babies who were left to fall asleep on their own won’t cry if they suddenly wakes up in the middle of the night, if they were not hungry they would just go back to sleep or play by themselves.. and babies who used to play by themselves would develop faster..

Grandparents tend to be one of the factors that would spoil or turned childrens to brats.. But this is actually their role, they were meant to pamper and spoil their grandchildrens.. It is healthy if given for example on a weekly basis but not daily. It is the parents fault themselves. Sadly and sickening, most young parents simply shoved their babies/childrens to the grandparents to be taken care of. Just by taking pictures with your baby and post it all over facebook won’t make you a parent, you have to bath them, feed them, play with them etc.. It is your role to raise your child not their grandparents. No wonder your children won’t listen to you, who are you to them.. after all, they still have their grandparents to turned to.. and with them, they can get away with everything…

Speaking of getting away.. some parents just simply forgive their child whenever they did something wrong right after they made a not guilty face and said sorry. This is one big NO!NO!.. I know that you think your child is so cute with that sad puppy face but wrong is still considered wrong and they must be punished. One simple sorry simply won’t do. Discussed with your partner and rule out which are considered wrong and what type of punishment should be given. And stick to that, be consistent.. Don’t scold and punish them one day and let them go the other day for the same wrongdoings.

Whenever I, or the father were scolding any of our children, the other parent will not interfere. Often I see for example when one father was scolding his child, the mother would interfere to defend the child.. this is so unacceptable.. no matter how you detest it, voiced your concern behind closed doors afterwards and not in front of that child. Don’t give him/her any hope of people coming to their rescue each time they were in trouble. The other parent should not join in the scolding too; he/she should wait until the ordeal is over and help to console and knock some sense into the child later.

I always gawk in disbelief whenever I heard any parents bragging about their child mischievousness, and to make matters worse he/she did it in front of the child.. It might seem funny to them at the moment (although I found it not funny at all especially when it involves violence) but please avoid doing that.. you should have seen the expression of pride on your child face.. Hello!!! That is not something to be proud of.. and afterwards you’ll have a tough time correcting it, because you already instill it to the child that what he/she did was good/funny /cute or whatever you want to call it.. So, Lu Pikirlah Sendiri!!

Glad to share some of this Brat Buster Tips, hope that it would be beneficial to some. I’m not a child expert here, just a mother of two who simply refused to raise a brat. People around us were saying that we were lucky to have such a well behaved kids.. We were indeed truly grateful to have them but the truth is there is no luck involved at all, we just made a point to them that we, the parents are the one in charge since day one, not them.. and they understand the concept.. as simple as that..

Butter Prawn

2009-07-25T06:59:00.000-07:00

Bahan-bahan:

12 ekor udang

3 biji telur merah

3 sudu makan butter

daun kari

cili padi

serbuk kunyit

garam & gula

Cara-cara:

Panaskan sedikit minyak di dalam kuali,

Gorengkan udang yang sudah digaul bersama serbuk kunyit dan garam,

Masukkan daun kari dan hirisan cili padi,

Goreng seketika, angkat dan ketepikan.

Cairkan butter/mentega dalam minyak lebihan menggoreng udang

Kiraikan telur merah menggunakan bekas roti jala,

Masak seketika dan masukkan udang yang diketepikan tadi.

Masukkan sedikit gula. Masak sehingga telur garing dan angkat.

Boleh toskan minyak berlebihan.

Kerabu Kacang Botol

2009-07-25T06:42:00.000-07:00

Resipi ni sedap dan senang, sesuai sangat dimakan panas2 dengan nasi putih sebagai lauk bersahur.

Goreng sampai garing sedikit bilis, angkat dan ketepikan. Kemudian tumis sedikit bawang merah hiris/tumbuk, masukkan juga hirisan cili padi. Perasakan dengan garam dan gula. Akhir sekali masukkan kacang botol yang dihiris bersama2 bilis yang digoreng tadi. Masak seketika sebelum diangkat.

Bye Bye Vietnam

2009-07-07T07:25:00.000-07:00

Sorry all for not being able to update this blog.. I've been super busy for the past couple of weeks.. no time for blogging, facebooking and even TV.. I can't even remember the last time I watched TV.. The reason being is I was being repatriated back to Malaysia.. we are bidding farewell to Vietnam that has been our home for more than 3 years.. Melati actually refers to Vietnam as home.. she's only 1 1/2 years when we first came here..

On 26th June we pack all our stuff to be shipped to Malaysia..

The next day we decided to spend our last weekend in Vietnam doing the same thing that we have done for all other weekends before.. as if we are not going back to Malaysia the day after that..

We start the day with our usual wrestling and gigling session on the bed..

Nilam is having her last swim with her Japanese friend Aoi..

Later the girls begs to go to their favourite restaurant, The Satay House.. We were actually quite lazy to go there today since it is situated quite far from Ho Chi Minh but the girls keep saying that although there'll be plenty of food in Malaysia but it won't be the same since it is not from Satay House.. pretty smart reasoning huh?

With Uncle Ahmad Foo.. the Satay House towkey..

And finally to the movies.. It's all that we ever do here.. we were watching Night at the Museum II that afternoon..

We stopped by for our favourite Pho noodles stall on the way to the airport.. We are going to miss starting our days slurping those delicious and satisfying broth..

Saying Good Bye to Quy.. our driver for the past three years..

We arrived in Malaysia on Sunday afternoon.. The first place that we go to is the Pasar Malam.. nilam is actually so "jakun" to see the Pasar Malam.. she keep asking whether all the food is halal.. the food I really miss the most here is the Apam Balik and Tau Fu Fa.. once we have to live abroad we will start to appeciate all those little things such as the pasar malam that sometimes define our culture and our country.. Another thing that I miss the most too is waking up in the morning to the sound of azan.. and I can't also wait for Ramadan to come..

Atuk and Nenek from both sides sending the girls off on their first day of school..

Melati's first school day experience and Nilam's first day of School in Malaysia.. Since it is July it is very difficult to find books for Nilam.. we searched the whole KL for certain books.. most store ran out of it but didn't order more because it is already July.. we end up photocopying some of nilam's books..

The girls now.. all settled in Malaysia.. they prefer kaftan now.. "Du Lundi Au Samedi" pyjamas are too hot to be worn here.. Unlike me.. they lose some chubbiness due to the transition... I secretly wished that I could lose some weight during all these but sadly that is not happening.. *sigh*

It's a relief to finally be home.. but Vietnam shall definitely be missed..

Trip to Long Hai, Baria, Vung Tau

2009-06-06T08:19:00.000-07:00

I've been so busy lately, with the packing, rushing to meet datelines, handover and all.. luckily last Thursday hubby's company organized a 3 day Family Day to Anoasis Resort, Long Hai Beach, Baria, Vung Tau.. finally.. I can breathe and smell the roses.. and to my relief.. there are no internet services inside the rooms.. so I can find an excuse for not answering emails for three days..

I've been wanting to go to the Anoasis Resort since 2006, ever since one of my colleague keep mentioning it.. but I can say I'm really dissappointed with the resort.. I won't recommend it to anybody.. the price is high, USD100++.. the area is pretty big, so you need to walk for a very long distance.. There is a buggy service but not as frequent as it should be.. We were lucky to get a room near the beach and pool but it was very far from the bus and reception.. the service is bad and the resort seems to be understaff and not really well kept.. The food is really expensive compared to the standard hotel price..

This is the stairs leading to our room.. It has a sea view but it is situated slightly uphill so you can't really sea or hear the beach..

This is another type, the cottage bungalow..

The girls were walking towards what they thought is the kids play area..

It turned out to have only a few toys and they need to share the area with the gym which has only three exercise machines..

This the pool and ping-pong hut..

Nilam really enjoys the swing.. we can only find these two swings.. perhaps there were more but we didn't walk far enough..

These are the rest area.. However, it is always too dirty to sit on..

The pool is quite big but it didn't have a sea view like other seaside resort..

With another Malaysian family at the resort grounds..

The beach is okay.. it is marked with white flags for safe area to swim and black flags for dangerous area.. However, the weather is too hot to take a dip..

Nilam has turned into one "budak hitam" after just two hours in the swimming pool..

These seaside beach hut is more inviting..

Especially for "puteri lilin" Melati that always seems to be "allergic" to the sun..

When the wheather is too hot to do anything else.. We just sat lazily at the beach restaurant sipping fruit punch and gazed at the ocean..

Perfect thing to do to let the time goes by if you asked me but not for Nilam and hubby who really loves to swim..

On the second day we went to Binh Chau Hot Spring 35 Km away from the resort. We initially planned to take a mud bath or take a dip in the big hot spring pool but we end up arriving there rather late that afternoon.. We then decided to just boil and eat some eggs and do the foot bath..

Nilam eagerly wait for her eggs.. we put the eggs in the basket and lowered it in a special place made to boiled them.. It should take 15 minutes for the eggs to cook through but we prefer half boiled so we just cook them for 10 minutes..

The children can't wait to taste their eggs.. of course it taste the same.. nothing different actually.. but the girls keep saying that the eggs taste better compared to the one at home..

We then took a foot bath in pool specially designed for it.. The water is quite hot, maybe because only three of us were using it at that time..

This is Nilam and Melati having lunch at Thuy Duong Restaurant on the way back to Ho Chi Minh City.. They refused to eat at the table and requested to eat at a window facing the beach.. I know Melati genuinely wanted to enjoy the sea breeze but Nilam probably just wanted to get her nose away from the smell of food at the table..

Overall, it was a nice getaway trip.. probably the last one for us to take in Vietnam for a very long time..

Am I weird??

2009-05-26T01:56:00.000-07:00

I love salad.. call it rabbit food or what.. I just love it..
The main attraction of a hotel buffet to me is the salad spread (other than the desserts section of course..)
My colleague once said to me that I'm weird based on my favourite salad dressing which is the creamy french dressing claiming that you can actually predict a person character based on their favourite dressing.. I can accept it if people call me weird based on what I've done.. but based on my choice of dressing???
I'm not sure if he got it from any of the stupid quizzes in facebook (one of the reason I seldom log in to facebook anymore.. because everbody is so busy doing stupid quizzes.. hehe..)
Anyway.. curious about it.. I google it out and found all these interpretation..

Ranch dressing is a condiment made of buttermilk or sour cream, mayonnaise, minced green onion, garlic powder, and other seasonings mixed into a sauce.

You'd probably pick the country over the city.
You are a well rounded individual.
You're very creative and artistic.
You're great with your hands!!!
You love being with your friends...a social butterfly who's also a team player-people love you for that.

The Blue Cheese dressing.
You're laid back and care free.
You like taking it easy.
Even though you love to lounge, you are always up for an adventure.
Competitiveness is not in your nature.
You like to spend a lot of money on food: take out, cooking, or eating out.
Your friends love your free spirited attitute and appreciation for the good things in life.

I guess this is the most famous dressing in Malaysia.. The Thousand Island dressing!

You're a lover not a fighter.

A True romantic with strong values.

You love to think and figure people out, but sometimes you think TOO hard.

Your friends want you to chill out JUST a little bit.

The Vinaigrette dressing.

You're tasteful and eccentric.

You're style is unique.

Your best characteristic is that you're able to resist temptation, and you're all about quality rather than quantity.

Your friends aspire to be like you.

And finally the French dressing!

You're the risk taking dare devil.

You don't mind the spotlight, but would rather be alone than in a tight crowd (this is actually spot on).

In a game of truth or dare you'll always pick dare.

You're spontaneous and witty.

Your friends think you're a bit nuts though.

There you go.. hahaha.. (I can be spontaneous and witty but nuts??)

what's your favourite then? or maybe if you are not a fan of these rabbit food, what salad dressing are you??

Grilled Lamb

2009-05-25T07:37:00.000-07:00

My hubby came back from work craving for grilled lamb today.. Here's my quick fix grilled lamb recipe..

Lamb

Marinate 4 piece of lamb with 2 tsp Mc Cormick Broiled Steak seasoning salt, 1 tbsp Kraft A1 Steak sauce, 1 1/2 tbsp honey and a dash of Lea & Perrins Worchester Sauce. Leave it for a few minutes.

Heat 1 tsp of oil in the pan and seared/cook the lamb (I usually avoid using Olive Oil for frying, it tastes better but I've read somewhere that it could be carcinogenic).

Veggies

I happen to have only carrot and potatoes in the fridge.. you can use whatever you like; broccoli, cauliflower, peas or brussel sprouts.. and steamed those vegetables, it tastes much better compared to just blanching.. grilled/sauteed baby tomatoes goes great too with lamb..

Gravy

Just heat up the pan already used for cooking the lamb, melt 1 tbsp of butter.. sauteed one clove of garlic(thinly sliced).. add in 1 tbsp of flour.. cooked the flour for a while and later add in some water until the desired consistency ; season with 1/2 tulang rusuk/beef maggi cube and 1/2 tsp of ground black pepper.. You can also add a bit of dark soya sauce if you want the gravy to have a slightly darker colour.

Extreme Makeover

2009-05-24T08:43:00.000-07:00

I should have started packing by this weekend.. However there is something more important to do.. I shouldn't delay any longer mending Melati's best friend.. her rag doll.. she pronounced it as "Dau". She would bring that doll everywhere and she couldn't go to bed without it..

This is Melati at 6 months old.. already inseparable with the doll.. I bought this doll for Nilam but I put it in Melati's cot when she was born.. Among all of the toys that I've put there, that doll was the first and only thing that she reached for.. It is also sad to think that at this early age Melati already learned that her parents are not that reliable and could not always be by her side and she try to seek comfort in a more reliable thing such as the doll..

This is the condition of the doll now.. the face is so thin you can actually see the cotton that was stuffed inside.. The head is almost bald, the dress is torn and already lose it's colour..

This is the doll new look in which I've spent my weekend achieving it.. I sew on a new piece of white cloth on it's face, neck, front and back. I replaced the hair with a longer, pink coloured hair, made a new dress and add a hat.. Only the hands and feet remains untouched..

Melati screamed and threw the doll the first time I handed it to her.. Eventually she pick it up and started accepting it.. She must have realised that it still smells and feels the same as the old "dau"..

Weekend in Lotte Mart

2009-05-17T09:20:00.000-07:00

We don't have that many choices of places to go on weekends.. There is a few shopping complex but we are really not into shopping here in Ho Chi Minh because there is no size for us here (only S & M for Vietnamese).. We keep on rotating a few play areas such as at Saigon Tax, Maxi Mart and craft centres at Fahasa Bookstore.. It is too hot to go to the theme Parks (which is nowhere near what we have in Malaysia).. Luckily there is a new addition now, the Lotte Mart.. Actually I would rather sleep or rest at home when both of us were not working on weekends but my youngest daughter always begs to go out.. I didn't send her to school yet so weekends are the only time for her to get out of the house..

Lotte Mart is located at Phu My Hung, District 7.. it took about 30 minutes to reach there from our apartment by car.. It is considered far by Ho Chi Minh standard (certainly not by KL standard)..

This is the first floor.. It looks okay.. except for the fishy smell from the Hypermarket..

Funny that the girls go gaga over this huge fridge replica.. they actually thinks that the fridge is real and was wondering how to open it..

This is the main reason why we love it here, the big play area.. Cost about RM10 per child for 2 hours.. It is very clean, partly because it is new. The crowd who goes there is quite okay too.. not the really "bukit" one.. (the bukit one will just let their children's pee's everywhere.. no need to go to the toilets.. especially if they were paying for 2 hours)

Melati really enjoys the ball pit..

Nilam is too old for ball pit.. she loves all the puzzles and educational toys but she can't leave Melati alone.. she plays with the foot piano near the ball pit instead..

The girls were waiting first in line for the train ride that comes every 30 minutes..

This train ride also was Melati's favourite..

While waiting, we went to see the movie at the VIP cinema which is situated just next to the play area.. I've watched X-Men, but it is better than just sitting outside the play area..

I really love the seat.. it is a recliner, you can actually lie down and sleep.. It may not be that important in Malaysia, but to us it is very important here. Vietnamese like to put their foot up (Don't laugh, this is true, they can even put their smelly, filthy foot, long nails etc in a magazine folder in airplanes, yuck!! the reason why I didn't even touch the magazines in domestic flight..) We often choose the last seat in a normal movie theatre to avoid smelling their feet from behind, side and above.. no worries here, slightly expensive but worth it.. It takes about 40 recliners to fill up one movie theather.. however, only 3 people including us were watching X-Men that afternoon.. almost empty.. Wonder if we have a cinema like this in Malaysia..

The rides is a bit expensive here according to Vietnam standard - RM1

Nilam was ecstatic to see all these cute things.. but she couldn't buy anything since she forgot her purse.. Me and her father end up buying two cute picture frames to put at our office.. hehehe..

I'm leaving for Hanoi now.. some urgent thing suddenly came up this morning.. My husband already left for Hanoi earlier.. Both of us can't cancel our plans.. We have no choice but to leave the girls in Ho Chi Minh with the maid and neighbours for tonight.. hopefully no harm will ever come to them..

Gulai Telur & Bilis Goreng Kicap

2009-05-16T05:56:00.000-07:00

I'm going to start a new recipe thread called "Simple Recipe"... these are all simple, fast and easy to do recipes suitable for busy career women and not to forget busy medic students :P.. Today's simple recipe is Gulai Telur & Bilis Goreng Kicap.

Gulai Telur

Bahan-bahan:

5 biji telur itik (kalau takde telur ayam pun boleh cuma telur ayam senang hancur + kurang sedap)

semangkuk santan pekat (yg segera dalam tin pun boleh)

6 biji bawang merah (dikisar @ ditumbuk lumat)

2 ulas bawang putih (dikisar @ ditumbuk lumat)

1 inci kunyit hidup (dikisar @ tumbuk lumat - boleh pakai serbuk kalau tak ada)

1 inci halia - dihiris kasar

1 inci lengkuas - dihiris kasar

1 batang serai - dititik

1-2 asam keping

4-5 batang kacang panjang

3-4 biji cili padi

Garam dan Gula

Cara-cara:

-Pecahkan telur satu persatu didalam air yg mendidih dan rebus sampai masak.

-Angkat dan ketepikan telur

-Masakkan santan bersama2 bahan kisar, halia dan lenkuas yg dihiris, serai yg dititik.

-Kacau sentiasa

-Setelah mendidih masukkan asam keping, garam dan gula (Jangan sekali2 masukkan aji nomoto - tak sedap)

-Akhir sekali masukkan telur, cili padi (buang tangkai) & kacang panjang (sekiranya mahu gulai lebih pedas, cili padi boleh ditumbuk/dikisar bersama2 bawang)

-Hati2 mengacau supaya telur tidak hancur, boleh diangkat setelah kacang masak.

Bilis Goreng Kicap

-Gorengkan bilis sampai garing; ketepikan

-Dalam sedikit minyak tumis hirisan bawang besar dan cili padi/cili hidup sampai wangi

-Masukkan gula, garam dan kicap (agak manis, kalau pakai kicap manis pun boleh)

-Akhir sekali gaulkan bilis yang dah digoreng tadi

Sedangkan lidah lagi tergigit....

2009-05-15T01:41:00.000-07:00

Yes.. the phrase above is from an old P.Ramlee songs that always reminds us about marriage..

Sedangkan lidah lagi tergigit
Apa pula suami isteri
Buang yang keruh ambil yang jernih
Baru teguh peribadi
Suami isteri mesti berpakat
Rumah tangga mendapat berkat

I can't help thinking about my two friends that were having a marital problems right now.. I'm glad that they confide their problems with me but at the same time I felt really hopeless.. I can just lend an ear and maybe gave a couple of advice but everything must actually comes from them to improve their marriage.. they are the one that have to try to work it out..

Sadly nowadays we see a lot of broken marriages, unlike when we were much younger, we seldom heard of people getting a divorce.. people nowadays are so easy to pick divorce as a solution.. and the victims are always their children's.. my children's suffered whenever my husband is working away from home for a long period of time.. I can't imagine the ordeal that these children's had to go through when their parents are divorced..

I've been married for more than 8 years.. It is not that long compared to others but I am truly grateful that we have been blissfully happy for the past 8 years together. Of course there are some down moments in our marriage like others but divorce has never been considered as an option.. We got married based on love and we hope that it stays that way forever for all eternity..

I'm not a marriage expert here.. just sharing some thought's on marriage which might be beneficial to others..(to remind me too at the same time :P)

1) Someone told me before that marriage is like buying a music CD, you get some songs that you really like but you also get the songs that you don't like as well.. You have to accept your partners weaknesses not only his/her strength.. of course you have to tell him/her whenever they make any mistakes but not up to a point that he/she thinks that you just try to find their faults.. We are all humans, everybody makes mistakes.. whenever we think that we are the victim for having to live with the other person, we should also put ourselves in their shoes and think also how difficult it must be for him/her to be living with somebody like us..

2) Marriage is like a business.. a partnership.. both side has to contribute... of course each of us has already got their own designation; husband - provide for the family, wife - take care of the household and children.. But we cannot expect only one partner did everything.. For example if the wife is working, the husband should help with the housework and childrens too.. same goes to the wife (if she's working).. once in a while she can help in settling some bills not just leave it to the husband alone.. We cannot expect only one partner to come up with initiatives.. If the wife is always more romantic that the husband, once in a while the husband should do a surprise too..

3) Avoid provocative statements or sensitive issues during arguments.. for example don't say things like "you act just like your stupid mother/father!! etc".. don't overly critisize your partners family member too.. maybe it is nothing to you but your partner might get hurt. Respect your in-laws just as you would respect your own family.

4) Whenever we had a big fight and things get ugly.. one of us would usually leave the house for a couple of hours (go to the movies, shopping, etc.. to cool down).. if we carry on we might say something too hurtful or do something which we might regret later.. But of course.. try to avoid any big fight/arguments (bad for the childrens).. try to talk/reason slowly in a civilised manner..

5) The little things counts.. Do something everyday for your partner no matter how little/insignificant but really shows that you care.. It doesn't have to be fancy.. a shoulder/foot massage, his/her favourite dish.. in this case action does speaks louder than words.. Always find some time to do things together.. for example at least eat or pray together once a day.. Always appreciate all the things that your partner do.. whether big or small..

7) Always keep a picture of you and your partner during the early days as a couple or newlyweds around the house.. Whenever things get rough you can always look back to those times when both of you were so much in love with each other..

8) This is important.. always take care not to have any bad mouth and body odour.. That is one big NO NO!!! (unless if your partner prefers the smelly you, hahaha :P)..

To both my friends, my prayers will always be with you.. hopefully you would be able to solve all your problems.. Please don't give up on your marriage just yet.. don't give up on your love just yet..

P.P.O.K.

2009-05-10T20:32:00.000-07:00

This a term used by my friends and me for one type of species in a human race.. The type that has no shame, filthy and disgusting.. P.P.O.K. stands for Pengampu2 Orang Kaya.. Can't really remember how we first come up with these term though.. perhaps it was mentioned in some old P.Ramlee movies or something like that..

One good analogue for these P.P.O.K. species is the Remora fish. The Remora fish uses its suckers to connect itself to the shark and get a free ride on the shark's body. Remora eat the small bits of food left by the shark. The Remora's can swim just fine on their own, they just choose to become a shark sucker.. The shark on the other hand gain nothing from these relationship..

Another good analogue is from a film which I can't remember the name.. In this film the mother tries to explain to her daughter what is the child's father job which is obviously a P.P.O.K. She told her daughter that her father was doing something like transferring cakes from one person to another. Although the cakes initially doesn't come from him but he gets to keep the crumbs for doing that. The mother explains that in the end the father manage to keep a lot of crumbs and become rich because of that..

Nowadays, these P.P.O.K. are everywhere.. especially in politics.. they were swarming the big shots in politics like the flies swarming on the rotten meat.. If you are a somebody; businessman, Datuk or Tan Sri.. chances are you are going to have a few P.P.O.K. always around you and trying to get close to you.. These P.P.O.K. were willing to run errands for you.. like a dog doing things for their master.. but of course like any dog you need to give them treats like a doggie biscuits.. In P.P.O.K. case.. small amount of money or dinner will do.. But of course this is not their main income.. their main income is the money they get by introducing people.. by lobbying people everywhere they get to know a lot of influential people.. for example by introducing a contractor to somebody who will approve their project, the contractor will then pay the P.P.O.K. some significant amount of money..

I know that it is hard to believe that somebody is doing stuff like that for a living.. believe me, there are.. some have become very rich just by being a P.P.O.K... I don't know how this people goes to bed at night.. or willing to feed their children's from these kind of income.. To me, being a dishwasher at a mamak restaurant or a toilet cleaner is a much much more honourable job..

The same goes to the V.I.P... he'll never know those around him is a P.P.O.K. or true friends until something really bad happens.. When something bad happens all these P.P.O.K. will vanished into thin air.. those that remains by his side are his true friends.. My husband once asked me why did I choose to marry him, I have lost all the chances to become a Datin, Puan Sri or Toh Puan. I told him that being a V.I.P. was not and never in my dreams at all.. the reason is simple, by being a normal, ordinary person I get to have friends around me and not P.P.O.K's..

Mother's Day

2009-05-10T01:38:00.000-07:00

I never knew what is the date for Mother's day or Father's day every year. I just don't care.. It doesn't mean that I didn't appreciate my parents but celebrating it seems too westernized (maklumlah.. aku orang kampung).. and not just mother's, father's day.. I never care about women's and children's day too.. and don't even mentioned valentine (I felt like vomitting thinking about all those people who celebrate valentine day).. and I kept thinking why do we need to celebrate our parents only once a year, we should cherished them and make them happy every day..

This year I was aware that today is a mother's day since nilam kept mentioning it a few times yesterday.. However, I never expect to received any special treatment or any gifts today.. Some mother's might feel sad if they didn't received anything from their family but not me.. It doesn't matter to me at all..

However, when I open my eyes this morning there stood nilam in her pyjamas grinning from ear to ear wishing me mother's day.. She hand me a drawing that she just finished as a gift.. she woke up early on Sunday morning to make sure she finished the drawing before I woke up.. I was speechless.. I was so moved by her small yet sweet gesture, I almost cried.. Deep down I felt really embarassed because in my 34 years as a daughter I never did anything like that for my mother..

My sister's used to sent my mother the mother's day card but not me.. perhaps that is how my mother must have felt when receiving those cards.. I'll make sure to send her one too next year.. insyaallah..

Drama Queen

2009-05-07T21:06:00.000-07:00

Nilam is such a drama queen. She cried her eyes out for three days when I told her that the three of us, me, herself and her sister most probably will be going back to Malaysia in two months time. It gets worse especially in the morning before going to school. The main reason for her crying is due to the fact that she will have to leave her school and friends (and not because of leaving her father in Vietnam - kurang asam betul anak ini..)

I never expected that she would react this way considering on how she always complain about the current school; very strict teacher, naughty kids etc.. I genuinely thought that she would be happy with the news.. On the third day I started to lose my patience.. (I slightly raised my voice; regretted doing so but I had to get the point across to her).. I explained to her the reason for moving back; that Vietnam is not our country and sooner or later we have to go back to Malaysia.. I told her that it is not mine nor her father's choice and nothing we can do to change it.. I used the examples of her other friends that already left Vietnam to go back to their country.. she seems subdued but still crying when I drop her off at school..

Later that evening, she seems to be her cheerful old self again, she does her homework after mengaji (surprisingly without being told to this time); have no problem finishing her rice (another surprise); read a book and gave me and her father a kiss before bed.. I guess my explanation (or yelling) works..

The fact is.. moving has always been hard on childrens, it gets worse when they get older.. We move house almost every year (in Malaysia too).. The first few days in a new place is hard on the parents too for having to deal with the childrens tantrums..

Here are some tips on moving with childrens..

1. Keep them in the loop

As soon as you know there’s even a possibility of a relocation, include your children in the conversation. Don’t wait until it’s a sure thing and then spring it on them. Listen to their concerns and tell them to come to you with their fears, anxieties and questions.

2. Explain everything, assume nothing

Assume your children know nothing about what a move entails. Very young children will be confused about what they’re able to take and what they won’t. They don't always know what is part of the house and what doesn't convey. Assure them that all their toys, clothes, furniture and belongings will be put into boxes and taken to the new house.Walk around your house with your child. Have him point to things and tell him, “Yes, your bed is going to the new house.” “No, that wall is going to stay here.”

3. Be positive and upbeat about the move.

Your attitude about the move will influence your children attitude as well. If you dread moving, then the move will seem dreadful to them too. Be enthusiastic, upbeat, and positive about the new experiences and opportunities in store, and your children will be more likely to feel the same way.

4. Involve them in the home buying process

If possible, take your children along on your house hunt. Make clear at the onset that the final decision is up to the adults, but that their opinions will be considered.If you can’t take them along, keep them involved. Take pictures of the houses you're considering and bring them back to show the kids.

5. Let your children know they can help with the move.

This is a good time to emphasize that the move is a family event and that everyone will be part of the planning and packing. Start your kids on thinking of things they can do and how to get ready for the move. Assure your kids that their contributions, however small, will be valued and greatly appreciated.

6. Plan a nice goodbye

Before you move, throw a going-away party for your kids and invite their friends.

7. Make the transition fun

Plan to splurge a little bit on transitioning from one home to another. Spend a night in a hotel with an indoor pool. Go to fun, kid-friendly restaurants for meals. Set aside time to see a movie or theme parks.

8. Know your child’s new school

School is the center of your child’s universe. She’ll only be happy if she’s happy in school. As soon as you know where you’ll be living, contact the school and get information on how to register and what documents and paperwork are required. Specifically ask about transitioning between classes and what supplies your child will need. As soon as possible, meet personally with the guidance counselor, principal and your child’s teachers and take a tour of the building with your child, so she can familiarize herself with his new surroundings.

9. Keep similar routines

With toddlers, keep things and routines familiar to ease the transition. Set up a toddler's new room similar to the old one.

10. Reward them

Find something new, good and different about the new house or town and play it up. i.e Buy a trampoline for the new, bigger yard. Give this new place something new the old one didn’t have.

11. Make their rooms a priority

Before you start fixing up the new house, do your kids a favor and let them redecorate their rooms first. Let them pick out a paint color and a new bedspread. Having a place they feel comfortable and can call their own will work wonders for their settling in.

12. Explore

Once you arrive in the new place, start exploring. What does your new location have that you’ve never experienced? Start reaping the benefits of your new environment right away. Your kids will feel like they’re on a vacation.

I end my entry today with a video of nilam (taken by her class teacher) doing some activities in her class.. She'll definitely lose that British accent of hers once she starts schooling in Malaysia..

Gambit

2009-05-07T00:54:00.000-07:00

A friend sent me a message through GTalk today.. err.. is this your blog or buku resipi?? hahaha.. Hello!! blog is about sharing, If I can share my favourite recipe with you guys, why not??

I guess it is time to put something light and fun and not so housewifey..

I got an sms from my younger brother today;
Kak Na, character favourite Kak Na dulu ada dalam movie XMen Origins.. huhu..

I almost forgot about that. Yes, when I'm much younger my favourite X-Men character is Gambit.. Despite what everybody is saying, I always love Gambit. To me the guy is mysterious, slick and has class.

Gambit's real name is Remy EtienneLeBeau. He possesses the ability to manipulate kinetic energy, as well as a hypnotic charm. He is also skilled in card throwing, hand-to-hand combat, and the use of a staff. Originally a professional thief and has an on and off love interest with Rogue. He is also known as a ladies man. Taylor Kitsch played Gambit in the 2009 film X-Men Origins: Wolverine and to my opinion he portray the character quite well.

Dik Wan (my brother) likes Juggernaut..
(Yes, there are some people who prefers Juggernaut than Wolverine.. hehehe..)

He was initially a villain but later joined the X-Men. The Juggernaut possesses superhuman strength that approaches that of Hercules. In an incredibly weakened state, he has been strong enough to rip off and wield the entire corners of buildings as giant weapons. Juggernaut has completely inexhaustible stamina, and the ability to survive without food, water or oxygen. He possesses tremendous durability, and can further protect himself through a practically indestructible force-field. Even Wolverine's adamantium claws has no effect on Juggernaut.

Juggernaut has the mystical attribute of being physically unstoppable: Once in motion, virtually no obstacle or force is able to impede his movement. But then again, Juggernaut is Juggernaut.. nothing more to say about his character except his physical ability.

and if I'm not mistaken irah's favourite character is Professor X.. (betul ke irah?)

His name is Professor Charles Francis Xavier, usually referred to as Professor X. He is the leader and founder of the X-Men. Professor X is paraplegic but his body houses one of the world's most powerful mutant minds. As a high-level telepath, Xavier can read, control and influence human minds. A scientific genius, he is also a leading authority on genetics, mutation and psionic powers. In the films, he was brilliantly portrayed by actor Patrick Stewart.

Everybody seems to have their own favourite.. Guess it depends on what power they think is the best or if given a choice, which power they would like to have....

What's your favourite character then dear bloggers??

Sau Rieng Season

2009-05-03T04:53:00.000-07:00

Sau Rieng meaning Durian in Vietnamese.. The King of all fruit.. It's Durian Season now.. although I always felt feverish after eating some, I still don't want to miss eating it at least once every season.. The good time to eat it of course during weekends..

There is one problem though.. The apartment imposed a strict "No Durian's" rule.. Our driver was caught once while smuggling it before and refused to do it again. This time our strategy is to put it in a tupperware, wrapped with newspaper and put it inside a bag to get pass through the security.

We went to the roadside stall last Friday night. As usual we have to argue first to buy the local durians.. I do not know why the vendor always insist for us to buy the durians from Thailand.. Maybe because he can charge a higher price.. we never like the one from Thailand, it is hard and not sweet at all.. it taste quite awful actually.. The local durian's however, taste heavenly.. a bit like our Durian Kampung..

When we got back and open the tupperware, all the durians turn mushy and out of shape.. We then decided to make it into "kuah durian" and eat it with soft, light pancakes.. of course we end up feeling feverish this weekend.. it was really worth it though..

The Value of Money

2009-05-02T02:50:00.001-07:00

I gave my 7 year old daughter her first purse today, together with her first allowance. I wanted to start teaching her the value of money and how to manage it properly. She threw me a puzzled look and start asking questions i.e. what is an allowance? I explained to her that starting from today I would only give her 200,000 to 250,000 dong per week and she has to manage herself with the money (what to buy and how much to saved) and if she finished all the money she will have to wait for the next Saturday for another allowance. She seems to understand the concept and happily put the money in her bag for an outing with me.

She first asked to go to the toy shop to buy a present for her friend's birthday tomorrow. She bought a huge present which include the wrapping, cost more than 200,000 dong. She doesn't even seems to mind to spend almost all of her money for the present. Initially, I'm quite worried to see this.

At the SuperMarket, as I was about to pay for some groceries she told me that she previously saw a cute bowl and wanted to buy it. She then ran to get the bowl and pay for it. Again, I was worried. There were dozens of bowls at home, there is no need to buy one. She never asked to buy something like this before and now that she has the money she bought something that is quite unnecessary. Although it just cost about 9000 dong and I have to admit that it is cute but now I'm worried that instead of teaching her the value of money I'm turning her into a shopaholic (like one of her auntie ;P)..

Later we stumbled into this 50th Barbie Anniversary Promotion, for just 20,000 dong (RM4).. They'll groom the children into princesses and have their picture taken. Nilam told me that she wanted to do it and for the first time I saw the worried look on her face when she asked me whether she has to pay for it. That really leaves me in a dilemma; I do not know how much money that she have left and I'm afraid that later if she doesn't have enough money I might have to add some and I really don't want to do that. Eventually I told her that this one is on me and I'll pay for it this time. I also stressed that I'll pay for something like this (movies, circus etc..) but for stuff like storybooks etc she'll have to buy it herself. She then happily went for the photo session..

As soon as we reached home, she immediately start counting all her money and proclaimed that she still have 26,000 dong. She then placed her purse safely in her drawer before taking a nap.

And here I am, still thinking to myself whether what I did today is actually a good decision or not..

Nasi Dagang Terengganu

2009-05-01T00:05:00.000-07:00

I celebrated Labour Day by cooking Nasi Dagang for my family.. I seldom had a chance to cook at home.. glad that I choose to cook these.. lama dah tak makan.. teringin..

Bahan2 Nasi
4 cawan beras Siam/Jasmine
1 cawan beras Pulut
3 cawan santan cair
2 cawan santan pekat
4 ulas bawang merah (dimayang halus)
1 inci halia (dimayang halus)
1/2 sudu teh halba (fenigreek seed)
Garam dan gula secukup rasa

Cara2 Memasak Nasi
- Rendam beras selama 6-8 jam.
- Toskan dan kukus selama 1/2 jam.
- Angkat dan gaul rata dengan santan cair.
- Kukus balik sampai masak.
- Campurkan santan pekat dengan gula, garam, hirisan bawang, halia dan halba.
- Angkat nasi dan gaul rata dengan santan pekat tadi.
- Sedia untuk dihidang
(Tip:Elakkan menutup nasi ketika masih panas dan jangan sekali2 memanaskannya balik dalam rice cooker)

Bahan2 Gulai
1 ekor ikan tongkol sederhana besar
5 cawan santan
2 sudu besar rempah Gulai Nasi Dagang
1 peket kecil rempah Gulai Cap Bunga Ros
10 ulas bawang merah (dikisar)
10-15 biji cili kering (dikisar)
1 inci halia
1 inci lengkuas
2 keping asam gelugor/keping
10 biji cili padi
Garam dan Gula Melaka

Cara2 Memasak Gulai
- Rebus ikan sehingga air kering dan ikan empuk; Tip:Rebus bersama2 garam (2-3 sudu teh) dan 5-6 asam keping. Boleh dibuat sehari sebelumnya.
- Masak santan (Tip:elakkan guna santan segera kerana santan segera susah naik minyak)
- Masukkan cili padi, bawang, rempah dan masak lagi sehingga naik minyak.
- Kalau kering masukkan sedikit air.
- Masukkan ikan, cili padi, asam keping, garam dan gula melaka.

Option:Disamping ikan, boleh juga masukkan telur rebus dan udang tapi udang harus direbus berasingan sebelum dimasukkan kedalam gulai bagi mengelakkan rasa air udang mencemari gulai (Actually only my family recipe that add prawns and eggs, other people in Terengganu only used fish)..

Selamat Mencuba!!! :P

Most Viewed

2009-04-30T08:35:00.000-07:00

This is my most viewed photo on my flickr page http://www.flickr.com/photos/nurdiana/ of all time.. It is a photo of one street kid in downtown Ho Chi Minh.. I capture it on my way back from the office one Sunday morning.. My heart just breaks everytime I see any of these street kids.. It makes realise how fortunate I am and also my childrens for having a roof over our head and having somebody that we can depend on. These street kids have nobody that they can depend on except themselves.. This one in particular, looks healthier as compared to others, and not as dirty too.. I couldn't bring myself to take photos of the others, I feel like I'm taking advantage of others misfortunes.. This one unlike the others are not beggars too.. At the time this photo was taken she was too engrossed playing with her "batu seremban" and didn't even realised that I snap her photo.. Her small bag suggest that she might be selling lottery tickets for a living.. My Vietnamese friends told me that these children really don't have anybody (no father or mother) and they really are living on the streets.. that explained why most of them have dark skin and brown hair due to too much exposure to the sun..

Fortunately there is something that we can do to help the street kids in Vietnam. Please go to http://www.cncf.org/ The Christina Noble Children's Foundation is dedicated to helping children in need with education, medical care, social opportunities, and job placement. For just as little as $31USD/month, we can sponsor a child for the opportunities to get a meaningful education and proper health care. Most of all, we are giving hope to those in need..

Nasi Minyak Terengganu

2009-04-29T23:36:00.000-07:00

Hari ni cuti, so masak nasi minyak for lunch.. Preferably pakai daging, tapi daging habis, buat nasi minyak ayam ajelah.. sedap jugak.. complete dengan air sirap lagi.. alhamdulillah..

Bahan2 Nasi:

1 1/2 inci halia (diketuk)

1/2 biji bawang besar (sederhana besar) - dimayang

4 biji bawang merah - dimayang

2 ulas bawang putih - dimayang

1 batang kulit kayu manis

3 biji buah pelaga

2 biji bunga lawang

6 biji bunga cengkih

3 sudu makan minyak sapi

4 cawan beras basmathi

5 cawan air

1 cawan susu sejat ideal

seikat daun pandan

garam dan gula secukup rasa

sedikit perwarna merah

Cara2 memasak Nasi:

- Panaskan minyak sapi

- Tumis rempah 4 sekawan bersama2 halia dan bahan2 dimayang sampai naik bau

- Masukkan beras dan gaul sampai semua beras disaluti minyak, Tip:goreng beras seketika agar nasi menjadi lerai dan cantik

- Masukkan air, susu, garam, gula dan daun pandan

- Masak seperti biasa (dalam rice cooker)

Option:Setelah masak, titiskan pewarna merah dan gaul sehingga sebahagian butir nasi berwarna merah. Boleh juga ditambah perwarna hijau dan dihias dengan kismis, hirisan badam dan bawang goreng.

Bahan2 Gulai:

1 1/2 kilo ayam atau daging

4 sudu makan minyak sapi

1 biji kulit kayu manis

3 biji buat pelaga

6 biji cengkih

2 biji bunga lawang

1 1/2 inci halia - diketuk

6 biji bawang merah - dimayang

4 biji bawang putih - dimayang

5-7 biji cili kering - direndam air panas dan dikisar

4 sudu makan rempah kurma

3-4 biji kentang (dipotong 2)

2/3 cawan tomato puree (Option:boleh juga pakai sos tomato)

8 cawan air

1 cawan susu sejat ideal

2 cawan bawang goreng (lebihkan kalau mahu gulai lebih pekat)

1-2 sudu besar kicap

garam dan gula secukup rasa

Cara2 memasak gulai:

- Perap ayam/daging selama 1/2 jam dengan cili kering kisar dan rempah kurma

- Panaskan minyak sapi

- Tumis rempah 4 sekawan, bawang dan halia sehingga naik bau

- Masukkan ayam/daging yang dah diperap dan tumis sehngga rempah masak dan air ayam/daging keluar

- Masukkan air dan susu

- Masak sehingga mendidih dan masukkan tomato puree dan bawang goreng yang ditumbuk.

- Perasakan dengan garam, gula

Tip:Tambahkan sedikit kicap pekat (manis/masin) untuk warna yang lebih menarik

- Masukkan kentang

- Masak sehingga gulai pekat dan kentang masak. Sekiranya mahu daging ayam/daging lebih empuk lebihkan air dan masak lebih lama.

- Gulai ini rasanya agak manis dan masam (seakan2 kuzi)

Bahan2 Acar :

2 batang timun dipotong memanjang

1/2 cawan cuka

6 sudu makan gula

1 sudu kecil garam

1/2 batang carrot (dipotong halus)

1/2 biji bawang besar (dimayang halus)

1 biji cili merah (dipotong halus)

Cara2 membuat Acar :

- Larutkan gula dan garam di dalam cuka

- masukkan timun, bawang, carrot dan cili, gaul rata

- Lebih sedap disediakan lebih awal dan disimpan didalam peti sejuk beberapa jam sebelum dihidang.

The Ugly Vietnamese

2009-04-27T21:45:00.000-07:00

It has been three years for me to be working here in Vietnam. It hasn't been easy. Vietnam was spesifically fashioned for the Vietnamese, not for foreigners. I'ts their country and they are extremely proud of it and fiercely nationalistic. I can't wait for my repatriation back to Malaysia. Vietnam is still considered a poor country, but it is not the reason why I didn't enjoy my time here. Living here is actually not so bad considering the weather and food choice is almost the same as Malaysia. It is the people that I can't actually stand. Although a few of Vietnamese trait really make them unique it really does test my patience and endurance.

1) They are very selfish and self centered.
One example that I can see every morning is when using a lift to my office. My office in Ho Chi Minh is considered an A type building, similar to KLCC in KL, so everybody who use it are mostly educated office people and not the rural type. Whenever the lift door started to close and there were people running for the door nobody inside even bothered to touch the open door button. Even when the lift is not so full and their fingers are just inches away from the button. They just doesn't care because it is not them who were running for the lift. That is how selfish they were.

2) Queuing up is not in their dictionary.

Vietnamese never queue. I have seen one of my office mate go straight to the airport counter without even bother to queue up and there were such a long queue at the back. Even at a 5 star hotel there were hardly any queue to eat the buffet. Again, this is the educated population, not the rural type. Whenever I go shopping for groceries at the local supermarket I had to wait to pay or weight my groceries because they just go straight to the counter without even bother to queue. In the end, I had to be like them too to survived, don't even bother to queue.

3) Vietnamese just know how to smile and laugh.

Vietnamese would smile and laugh when they are sad, angry, embarassed, puzzled, uneasy, shy, grieving, etc.. so laughter actually covers a lot of situations!! that just sounds too good wasn't it?? Yes, it is good if you were a tourist, you must think that Vietnamese are so friendly, they always laugh and smile. But it is actually a pain when you are working with them. They would laugh whenever you try to make a point, laugh during an important meeting, laugh during a crisis, laugh when you try to correct what's wrong, laugh whenever you point out their mistakes.. hell.. Vietnamese will laugh in many situations where Westerners, Chinese or other asians certainly not.

4) Vietnamese are very stubborn.

Being stubborn is perceived as more of a virtue in Vietnam. In History they were stubborn with the Americans, French and Chinese. The Vietnamese are rightly proud of their unparalleled record of resistance to foreign domination. As a foreigner, I've had a hard time giving orders to Vietnamese, they would just give me a smile or laugh (as mentioned above) and then simply just doesn't do what they've been told.

5) Vietnamese are very rude.

It would take me a long time to elaborate further on this. It is easier to say that based on my standard and I believe many others they are very rude. I should add being nosy too. It has something to do with how they were brought up. Being nosy among many other things are not considered as rude in their culture.

6) Saving face is everything.

Vietnamese will never admit that they've done anything wrong or they didn't know certain things simply just to save their face. They would never point up any mistakes or firing incapable person simply just to save the person's face. Things are different if you are a foreigner though. Everything is simply your fault and you have to be blamed for everything including mistakes done by the locals, as if you don't have any face to be saved.

It is quite unfair to just point out their ugliness (as if Malaysians doesn't have any; we have plenty too). I've got a few Vietnamese friends (some with the exception of the above trait) and a few elderly Vietnamese to whom I look up to and respect. There are a few trait in which I actually admire :

1) Most Vietnamese are hardworking.

If you were able to get past through their ego they are actually very hardworking and willing to do a lot of thing to improve themselves. I sometimes wish that Malaysians could be as hardworking and dilligent as them. We are actually too pampered and never undergone hardship as them to realise the need to thrive.

2) They still uphold the family values.

There are three pillars of Vietnamese Society, family, family and family!! Immediate family, extended family and projected family. My bosses would regularly enquire me regarding my family's health and life; that seldom happened in Malaysia. Our office is like a small family unit - there is no secret, everybody knows everything. Contributed also by the nosy trait which I've mentioned earlier. However, the point here is, Vietnamese families still have dinner together at night, children still lives with their parents even after working and marriage and for most Vietnamese they actually fear nothing and nobody except their parents.

3) Punctuality.

They are much much more punctual than Malaysians. If the meeting supposed to start at 8.30 it will start at 8.30. In Malaysia, if the meeting supposed to start at 8.30 it will actually started at 9.00, the so called Malaysian Time.

4) Smile.

Although it is really annoying to me, I still marvelled and baffled on how they could laugh and smile in every situation. To me, this is one of the mystery of Vietnam..

Chilly Crab

2009-04-18T06:38:00.000-07:00

Ingredients:

5 garlic

5 shallot

10-15 dried chillies(soak in hot water to softens)

-blend/grind all the above ingredients with a little bit of water until they turn to a paste

6 tbsp peanut oil/vegetable oil

3 cups water

2 cm fresh ginger(bruised)

1 lemongrass(bruised)

2 tbsp oyster sauce

1 tbsp Maggi concentrated chicken stock

1 tsp sesame oil

1/2 tsp Lea&Perrins sauce

1/2 tsp ground white pepper

1 tbsp vinegar

3 tbsp sugar

salt to taste

2 big size crab or 3 medium size crab (cut to two)

garnish:

1/2 tomato (diced or cut triangular)

1 fresh red chillies (slice to small pieces)

spring onions (slice to small pieces)

Method:

-Heat oil, sautee the blended/grinded ingredients with lemongrass and ginger until fragrant

-Add in sugar, salt and oyster sauce, cook until some separation can be seen between the ingredients and oil

-Add in water

-Add in the vinegar, chicken stock, Lea & Perrins, white pepper and sesame oil

-Bring to boil, add in crab and cook until sauce thickens and crab is cooked through.

-Add in pieces of tomatoes and chillies slightly before finish.

-Transfer to plate and garnish with spring onions.

Good to eat with hot, fluffy white rice or hot bread.

Who Am I

2009-04-10T01:41:00.000-07:00

I lie in my hotel room in Vung Tau alone this afternoon, the meeting finished early and I end up with a few hours of free time until my husband and two daughters arrived from Ho Chi Minh City to join me tonight. Boredom creeps into me. Opportunities like this seldom came. Usually I would treasure it by dashing out to the street armed with my camera to get a few shots but I didn't bring my camera along this time.
As far as I can remember I've been busy all my life. I can't seem to find enough time for things and always on the run. However, when I got the luxury of time like right now I just feel so restless. I'm the eldest daughter of six siblings. Growing up I used to do a lot of housework around the house. I was so skinny back then, I guess it might be because I worked too hard and my growing body just could not cope with all of it. The last time I was ever being chubby is when I was five years old. I always offered to help around the house, sweeping, cleaning and taking care of my younger brothers and sisters. My studies were never affected though. I realised now that as early as eight years old I already learned on how to multitasking, on the value of time and how to manage it carefully. I remembered finishing my homework only at a time when my baby sister is sleeping, my left hand would be rocking the cradle and my right hand would write. When I got 5A for Penilaian Exam everybody was shocked because they never see me study for it.
I can't remember at what age when I started cooking though. I were always drawn into the kitchen everytime my mother starts cooking. Initially I just wanted to offer my help but my mother doesn't really like any children in the kitchen with her. She wanted to do all the action by herself and I was just like a pest to her. But no matter how much she would yell at me to get out of the kitchen, I would just sit there ignoring her voice and just watched her do the cooking. That was how my first lesson on cooking goes, just by watching. Eventually she would let me help her and later trust me to do the cooking. That is how I first learned how to cook. Later, cooking has become like a therapeutic thing for me. Whenever I feel stressed, I just cook something up and all the stress just melt away. During my University days, I end up getting better grades while staying at a rented apartment rather than while staying at a college hostel. Main reason I believe is due to the fact that I'm allowed to cook at the apartment.
Who am I? I'm just a normal, ordinary person. Whose life started as a daughter, a granddaughter, a niece, a cousin, a sister, a student and later evolved to become a wife, a mother, a worker and a proud citizen. I have many interest in my life, other than serving to those around me, I love taking photographs, cooking, reading and doing the jigsaw puzzle. When people asked me to create my own blog I kept on wandering who would want to read about a normal ordinary person like me. Who would care to read about me or what I'm thinking. Then again, as I think about it, maybe this blog can portray a piece of me that not many people knew. A piece of me as a cook for example. I have a few recipes and tricks up my sleeve which I can share and would be beneficial to others.
With this I officially started my blog. Right now I just have to think of a way to find the time to upload more entry.